Saudi Sexpat Stories: Tales from the Kingdom

Inspired by my favorite seminarian blogger Bro Utoy’s most recent “wolf-ish” entry, I, too, decided to momentarily let the “jologs” in me out of the closet to roam about freely in cyberspace…

Yes, it’s been nearly a month into our home leave here in Manila and apart from the “dreaded” medical procedures, you might be wondering what else have I been up to to while away my “precious” holiday time.

Like any other “Pinoy-tv-deprived” OFW spouse, I have been making good (?) use of my free time to surf the telly - and what interesting “finds” have I discovered! Let me share with you my top picks so far courtesy of (you guessed it) my other “family” - the “Kapamilya” station. Read ‘em and weep!

1. LOBO: I’d rather not elaborate too much on this.  After all, Bro Utoy already wrote such an “eloquent” piece about it… As I’ve said before, whatever it lacks in storyline, it more than makes up for in “star power” (hehehe) … especially with its much sought-after lead star, P (and it’s not Pilar Pilapil, huh!).
2. MY GIRL: Feel-good, teeny-bopper flicks like this always get me hooked - must be the “perpetual teenager” in me.  Never mind that it’s already a spin-off of a Koreanovela with the same title… Kim and Gerald - you’ve got a “fan” in me! :)  Now if someone would please pass the cornicks to max out the jolog-ish viewing experience…
3. GAME KA NA BA?: Game shows which challenge my trivia-laden brain are always a pleasure to watch.  Add to this the very entertaining way the show is hosted - by no less than the “Chairman” himself - and I find myself saying “Game Na!” many mornings over.  
4. THE SINGING BEE: Now this is the perfect show for those who couldn’t carry a tune yet are mindful of the correct lyrics of songs (like me!).  Though Buboy (uy, nickname basis pa - feeling close!) still has much room for improvement in terms of hosting skills, his appropriately-garbed yellow and black “Honey Bees” (the requisite back-up dancers in any Pinoy game show) as well as his “Band-ble Bees” (the band, ladies and gents!) definitely add a witty twist to this otherwise “blah” prime time offering.
5. WHEEL OF FORTUNE: Now, any true-blue kapamilya would never pass up a show with “Ate Kris”, right? If only for her “unique” hosting style, Krissy’s latest show is a definite must-see. Spin it, baby! You know the drill.

My only worry is that when we come back in-kingdom, I might have serious withdrawal symptoms from these new-found faves Hmmm… if only “someone” would hook us up to the TFC channel too (*hint, hint!*), I would truly be one “satisfied sexpat”.

Needed a major dose of cheering up as I have unfortunately fallen prey to some nasty bug again - yes, I guess I must’ve unwittingly “imported” some ”pesteng ahems” with me when I flew in from the kingdom  I distinctly remember how dear hubby was plagued with exactly the same symptoms (swollen throat, painful ears, difficulty swallowing - the works!) shortly before we left… (*sigh*)

What better way to do this than by finally doing my long overdue “cutesie-pie” sparkly friend tag from LP buddy, Jeanny…

Guess close to nothing beats a “care bear” in spreading some love and wellness around, right?

Well… a care bear, some doctor-prescribed pills, and steaming servings of this…

Hmmm…am really feeling much, much better now! :D  Thanks again, Jeanny!

To keep the “sparkly” caring, sharing and wellness going, I’m tagging Weng, Meeya, Thess and Nell.  Shine on, guys! :) 

(May paunang paumanhin sa kapatid kong si Pippo… )

Hulaan ninyo kung bakit malungkot ang kapatid ko sa larawang ito.

A. Hindi dumating ang regalo niya mula kay Santa

B. Medyo masakit ang tiyan niya dahil naparami ang kain niya sa kapaskuhan

K. Bigla niyang naalala nang iniwan siya ng “school bus” noong Grade 1 siya

D. Wala sa mga pinagpipilian sa itaas. Gumawa ng sariling kuro-kuro.

Kung ang sagot niyo ay titik “D” - hindi kayo nagkamali!

Ang litratong ito ay kuha ko sa “lobby” ng Westown Hotel sa Iloilo nang magbakasyon kaming mag-anak doon noong nakaraang Disyembre. 

Sa totoo lang, masaya talaga si Pippo dito.  Napaluha lang siya sa sobrang kaligayahan kaya nagmukha siyang malungkot - hahaha!

Sige na nga, pinilit kasi namin siyang mag-”emote” na “pang-Famas” upang i-”project” sa kamera ang di mapigilang kaligayahan (”touched”, kumbaga - hahaha!) sa pagkakalipat namin sa hotel na ito mula sa orihinal na “hotel from hell” kung saan kami inilagay ng aming travel agent.  Mula kasi sa kalunos-lunos na kalagayan namin sa naunang hotel - naroon na ang madilim at amoy amag na “corridors” papuntang kuwarto at ang “view” ng mga sinampay ng mga kalapit bahay na bubungad mula sa bintana - talagang abot-langit ang pasasalamat at tuwa naming makalipat sa mas bago at magandang hotel tulad ng Westown!

Ano kamo ang orihinal na hotel namin? Itago na lang natin siya sa pangalang “SM”…at ang kontrobersyal na tagline niya? “The Premier First Class Hotel in Iloilo”. Ano daw??? Yan ang talagang malungkot!

Since February has traditionally been associated with ”love”, methinks, why not post about something that I love doing? Hmmm… this should be interesting!

Call it “second childhood” but I recently re-discovered my love for gaming with “Crash Bandicoot: The Huge Adventure”.  I kinda’ stumbled upon the game after Luigi and Rafa let me try it out  in their GameBoy Advance thingies (which jolly old St Nick gave them for Christmas ). 

I honestly had serious reservations about the boys getting these presents - thinking how these could be totally addicting.  The GOOD NEWS: the boys aren’t hooked at all since they still manage to do all the other stuff expected of them (school work, chores, other “more educational” games) with nary a hint of any “addiction”.  The BAD NEWS: I think I am! (OMG! Waahh!). I never thought I could be this involved in a game again after “Game & Watch” (uh-oh, think I just gave my age away!) - hahaha!

Anyway, I am sure this is just a passing phase (or addiction denial?) In the meantime, I think I’ll just enjoy “crash-ing” a bit more. After all, gaming also makes for good bonding time with the two boys.  In fact, we  had such a great time together tonight trying our hands to get to the next level of the game.  What thrilled me even more was that they thought it was totally cool for me to manage to get through one level where they had some difficulty in completing - imagine that! (*major brownie gaming points for me*)  

I am also just amazed at how skilled my two boys have become in working their new gadgets - to the point that they are even the ones who guide me through difficult points in the game.  Whaddyaknow? Parents do learn a lot from their kids! 

Addiction or not, please indulge me in my current “passion” as I am definitely having a “Crash”-ing good time!

PS Pardon the dance moves - that’s just how it is when Crash gets carried away…

Finally found the energy to get back into the blogging groove after a long hiatus.  Guess this means that I’m now resuming my “cyberlife” which I purposedly put on hold for quite a while since we flew back to Manila a month back for the Christmas holidays.

While surfing the net a few minutes back, the tv was also on BBC’s “Teletubbies” in the background since Keith and the boys were watching with Marga in the same room.  Funny how my untrained ears can pick up totally different meanings to the words I hear…

Here’s how the scene on the tube went:

Little girl voice (describing her two pet birds while camera was panning on two birds in a garden bird bath separately): “I have two birds…one named ‘Pizza’, one named ‘Pork’…”

Me (looking up from pc distracted at hearing such “unusual” names): “What? Pizza and Pork?”

Luigi (giggling): “Ma, its ‘Peter’ (pronounced ‘Peetuh’) and ‘Paul’ (pronounced ‘Paw’)!”

Hay naku! Ang Pinoy nga naman (like me) - di kasi sanay sa “bloody British accent” e! What a hilarious way to start the day!

Happy new year, everyone! More laughter-filled days ahead!

As this may very well be my last blog for the month and the year (since we are flying out to good ol’ Manila tomorrow - yahoo!) and in keeping with the merriment of the season, I wanted my final (?) post to be as light as possible.  Hmmm…what to write, what to write….

Aha! I think I have it… Read on…

If this dish were served to you, what would you think it was?

Well, that’s just what I did yesterday.  These were the replies I got from my three (Keith included) very blunt and heartless honest boys with ever-discriminating tastes:

Keith: “Ano yan, tokwa?”

Luigi: “Ma, is that bread pudding?”

Rafa (no comment) - Na-speechless ata!

Keith (again): “Parang puto”

Wrong, wrong and wrong again! What is the matter with you guys??? Can’t you even recognize an albino leche flan when you see one?

Yup, with utmost pardon to the Cuencas (whose traditional leche flan recipe I unwittingly “murdered” - sorry Weng!), this was my first try at making this much-loved Pinoy dessert.  I must say I even surprised myself! How could something so seemingly simple turn out looking so bad?

First off, I completely forgot to make the caramel topping (duh!) - which explains why my flan was as dry as the Arabian desert!  Next, although the recipe specifically said to “avoid bubbles” (which I thought I did - even skimming off the little bubbles on top of the flan mixture before steaming it), the texture of my finished product ended up looking like Swiss cheese more than anything else. What’s more, after cutting the flan, I found out bubbles galore - guess only bubble wrap had more bubbles than my leche flan!

There’s a redeeming factor to this kitchen misadventure, though… I’m happy to say, despite its sorry looks, my flan tasted great! In fact, the boys literally cleared the whole thing off the serving plate - as in, ubos lahat in one sitting! Buti na lang… at least this tale’s got a happy ending naman pala. Hehehe!

Lesson learned (to paraphrase the “great” Melanie Marquez): “Don’t judge my brother flan, because he it is not a book”.  In other words, to taste it is to believe it (or something like that!).

Enjoy the holidays, everyone! Till my next kitchen (mis)adventure!

 What better way to spread the magic of Christmas than by sharing this email from our cousin Geraldine.

Just click on THE MAGIC GOPHER and enjoy!

Amazing, isn’t it?

Just when I learned that a couple of typhoons struck Manila lately, I didn’t imagine how I would also experience my own kind of typhoon and flooding right here in the desert…in the comforts of our very home! Impossible? Not quite! 

Still woozy from lack of sleep, I groggily went to our front-loading washing machine to do my weekly laundry. I was literally aghast when, upon opening the machine door to load the dirty clothes, a torrent of water came rushing towards me! OMG!!! (as in, Oh my GUSH talaga!).  For a moment there I was stunned, like the proverbial deer facing the headlights of an oncoming car, while the water just came spilling out of the machine into the tiled floors of our mini-laundry area, flowing into the small hallway leading out into our room and also into the entrance of our tv/multi-purpose room – c’mon, is this for real??? Can this be happening??? Somebody wake me from this nightmare please!  

Alas, despite all my wishful thinking, I realized that a domestic disaster had indeed struck and, being the wet sleep-deprived zombie I have become, I was admittedly ill-prepared to face this, shall I say, “waterloo”… ;)  

Slamming the @#?!? washing machine door shut and mustering all my courage and strength, I did what I had to – Operation Linis-Baha, Activate!  With my trusty Vileda mop and bucket in hand, I began my early morning workout trying to keep the water contained in one area by mopping and wringing out the water as fast as I can ( I had to finish the task before Marga woke up or else there was a danger of her slipping on the wet floors! ). 

Sad to say, even this wasn’t working as well as I had hoped since a pool of water was still there begging to be cleaned out… What more can I do??? 

Plan B necessitated that I grab something larger to absorb the water and then dry up the area… Hmmm…Since di naman pang professional ang mga cleaning utensils ko, I had to make do with the nearest alternatives -  one of the boys’ hooded swim towels to absorb the water and my dirty cotton nightdress to complete the job of drying up.  Necessity is the mother of invention nga naman – hahaha!

So there I was, like a crazed sirena, mopping, absorbing the water with the towel, drying up, throwing the collected water into the nearby bathroom drain… keeping at it for the next hour or so until my mission was accomplished.  In the end, I managed to drain five bucketfuls of water – imagine that!  

Of course, what’s a mission about unless there is a “project report” afterwards, right? So I immediately called my “boss” to report the successful completion of the operation.  What did he have to say? “Paki-check mo nga yung manual para malaman what went wrong at nagbaha…” 

Uh, I don’t think so, honey… just not right now.  After some major mopping-up operations, I neither have the energy nor the interest to read up on some owner’s manual… I am pooped and I just need to chillax… 

Ka-pagod maging Darna! 

PS  Guess who were there to lend me support as I was facing this crisis? Who else but “My Friends, Tigger and Pooh”! Hahaha! Promise this wasn’t intentional - only realized the funny irony of it all after the whole ordeal was over!

Tagged by Weng on this one.  Being the dutiful cousin (hahaha!), siyempre, I oblige.

Here’s my Top 6.  Please note that I’m doing some sort of a “fast talk” here as am writing down the songs as fast as I remember them…  

1. STREET BEAT – Think Aga Muhlach doing his Michael Jackson moves as he struts his stuff in leather and chains.  Definitely “Bagets” era meets “D’Punks” is an apt description!

2. SINATRA’s NEW YORK, NEW YORK – I remember my grandfather relaxing in our living room while my dad plays the cassette tape of Sinatra on our tape deck.  “Sapak talaga si Sinatra,” my Lolo would say (“sapak” is his stamp of approval for the Rat Pack’s most famous crooner).  “Ang lamig ng boses,”he would further add.  Whaddyaknow? Some 20+ years later, I still agree.

3. TEARS FOR FEARS’HEAD OVER HEELS – I distinctly recall the dance move that went with this song…parang nagbubugaw ng langaw ang arms while the legs are stuck in one place na pa-bend-bend lang! C’mon, don’t be shy! For those who were in their puberty or early teens during this era, Huwag nang mag-pretend - I’m sure you know what I’m talking about – hahaha!

4. I WILL – This song strikes a sentimental chord in me as this is unofficially “our song”.  In fact, during our first night as husband and wife, Keith even brought a minus one (gosh, how dated ba? Di pa uso videoke dati e!) of this song so he could sing it for me – how sweet!   Listening to this, I can’t help but remember the “kilig” movie that this song went with - the re-make of “Love Affair” starring Warren Beatty and Annette Benning.  Sigh, how romantic talaga!

5. FALLEN from PRETTY WOMAN – Again, this song is pretty high on the “kilig factor” for me as it was one of my favorites from the film, “Pretty Woman”, which, incidentally, was also the very first film Keith and I watched on our first movie date together.  Haay, to be young and in love nga naman!

6. THE JOURNEY by LEA SALONGA – Re-discovered this song while watching Rafa’s Junior Prep commencement exercises where he was part of a group who sang it.  As I listened to the words more carefully, I appreciated it even more as it seems to tell the story of our lives now as a certified “pamilyang OFW”.  The part where she sings, “Through the darkest desert, through the deepest snow, forward, always forward I go,”is especially touching. Truly a sentimental favorite.

That’s all folks! Thanks for taking this trip with me – thoroughly enjoyed it.

Would Rina, Peachy, Claire and Joy do me the favor of doing this tag too? Sige na, am sure you’ll have as much fun as I did – promise!

Egged on by the “fishy” success stories of some of our Pinoy friends here in the Kingdom, and probably due to the upside-down hours we keep here during Ramadan season (i.e., all stores, malls and restos are closed practically the whole day – while there is still daylight – in deference to the Moslem practice of fasting - and open only from around 8 pm until 3 am the following morning – can you believe that?!?), Keith and I, together with the Megas, bought our very first fishing gear nearly a week ago.  We literally were so into the fishing adventure that we bit into it (pardon the pun) “hook, line and sinker”! 

The intention was simple: Do something productive during the “dead hours” and possibly be able to contribute a “fishy success story” of our own… After all, who wouldn’t want to be able to say that the fish we ate for dinner is guaranteed fresh (since kami mismo ang nanghuli!). Diba “nature na nature” ang dating? Something we never ever would have thought of had we stayed in Manila (where the closest we got to fishing is the “pseudo-fishing” we did at Island Cove in Bacoor, Cavite!).  Simple enough, right?  Or so we thought! 

Where we fish - the Dammam Corniche

Since Dammam is practically a coastal city, we are blessed to be able to drive off to the corniche in as little as 10 minutes from where we live, and throw our fishing lines to the Arabian Gulf.  So this is what happened the first time we ventured out.  We were full of high hopes and thoughts of catching 3 or 4 tilapia danced in our heads.  Three to four hours later, after our hooks being snagged on the rocks countless times and our lines getting tangled for the umpteenth time, and NO FISH BITING, we decided to call it a night.  So much for our fishy dreams!  Well, “charge it to experience”, we thought… Maybe the next time would be better… 

So, yesterday evening, we tried our luck again.  This time, we drove a little farther… to the neighboring town of Al Khobar (about 30 minutes drive from our place), since most of the Pinoys we knew apparently caught a lot of fish there.  Though a bit more skeptical, we were buoyed by the hope that probably the location would turn the tide for us.  We were the third party to arrive at the sandy sea side (the first two being fellow “kabayans” who already hauled in their catch of fish and crab) and we just felt the fish would bite this time. After all, Bro Cuz and fam even bought live bait this time (the squid stank like anything but what the heck! Anything for a bite, right?).  So, casting our lines, we found it promising that the fish were at least nibbling on our bait (though, for some reason, they were wise enough not to take the deadly bite!). Konti na lang, may huli na! We just felt it would be our lucky night! Anticipation mounted and we waited… and waited… and waited… AND WAITED… Heck, there was even a fish brave enough to jump at the water’s surface near our lines and yet nothing was biting! What gives??? Alas, three long hours after, as we shook off the sand from our shoes and bodies and tried to wash off the scent of the stinky squid bait from our hands, we again gave the dream up. We still were going home empty-handed.  Our hopes for a fresh fish dinner were doused and we had to settle for chicken shawarma on our way home.  Ano ba yan???  

Well, to look at the bright side, at least I got to know the Pinoy terms for the different fish that our other kabayans caught… Never thought that a “batotoy” would grow up to be a “bakokok” (then into a “bakekang”? Hahaha!)… or that you could actually eat “pagi” (ray) with coconut milk.  Too bad that all we got from our trip were little nuggets of trivia such as these and not actual “fish nuggets” (boohoohoo!). 

Well, better luck next time (again), I guess… We’re not giving up on the dream, though…  I’d like to be optimistic about this whole experience and think that when we were “gone fishing”, the fish were actually gone (on vacation, perhaps?) too! Bet when they come back soon, we would be ready for them… Till then, we look forward to the day when we can finally say, “Huli ka!”